Thursday, August 13, 2009

Death Panel Resurrects Joe Justice

10 months to the day! The DAY!

Even Fred Thompson is exited.

And the impossible has occurred. After witnessing crazy white person upon crazy white person avail themselves of handheld microphones at various town halls across America, and after seeing Sarah Palin start putting made-up death panel footnotes--FOOTNOTES!--in her Facebook wall comments, the time has finally come to get back on the bucking horse of shiny bullshit that is blogging and get to work.

First up, my former Senator (and for a time, boss, as intern) Chuck Grassley.

Chuck! You used to be so much fun! Folksy and funny. Closeted populist.

The guy used to walk around his Senate office joking, "Anybody mad at me?"

What happened, girlfriend?

Methinks it's a little thing called Jesus. Well. More like Jesus and his magical hold on the GOP, a.k.a. defensive, uncomfortable white people.

So, go back about 9 years. It all starts with a very special day for the Grassley interns, a day that happens at the very end of your tenure as, basically, a white kid who sits in the auto-pen closet and signs letters to constituents back home for a few hours a day. Anyway, Chuck takes the interns to the Senate cafeteria for lunch. And at said lunch, yours truly, a government major at Georgetown and all around Iowa Boy made the big mistake of asking Chuck whether he would charactize his conservative philosophy as effectively a Midwestern form of libertarian populism.

Chuck did not like this.

I'm back, kids. And this time I'm going to edit less and write harder. You betcha.

More to come.